My wife is not only a saint, but she's also a first-class cook. Ask anybody whose eaten her food. Anybody, that is, except my Dad. You could give my father a million dollars, and he'd complain about the taxes he'd have to pay.
Another plus about my better half is that she's just like me. On-time. If dinner is scheduled for 4:00 pm, I like to be sitting down and eating at 4:00 pm. My wife is the same way.
I once went to a Thanksgiving dinner where the turkey was going to be prepared in an oil-cooker, which, from what I hear, is pretty quick and makes for a tasty turkey. I had never had a fried turkey before, so I was looking forward to it. The dinner was scheduled at 5pm.
We got there on time.
No turkey.
We ate some nuts in a bowl.
No turkey.
An hour passed.
Still no turkey.
My wife and kids ate some more nuts and another hour passed...
Where the heck is the turkey?
Finally, after 8pm, somebody shows up with the turkey-fryer.
All right!
Everybody's nice and hungry and the show's about to get on the road, but, you know what?
No oil.
So that same somebody has to leave to go get the oil to fry the turkey with. By that time, it was late and my family was hungry. They had been hungry for a while. A bowl of nuts only goes so far. So we made our excuses, said our good-byes, and found a restaurant to have our Thanksgiving dinner in. I didn't even get to have a slice of the pumpkin pie I made, and I make a pretty mean pumpkin pie, even if I do say so myself.
I hear the turkey was finally ready a little after 10pm.
Later, my mother, who was still alive at the time but didn't go because she knows how this particular family is when it comes to time-management, told me, "Did you try the turkey? I hear it was delicious."
My punctual wife?
I guess I'll keep her.
Which is a long way to tell you that...
This morning, I heard someone skulking around downstairs at 0600 hours. (That's 6am, for you non-military types.) Heck, it was still dark. I picked up my Alaska Brown Bear Rifle and went down to check.
"Oh, hi," my father said, when he saw me. He was all dressed up and ready for his Thanksgiving dinner.
In the dark.
With the whole house asleep.
Sometimes, I have to feel sorry for the old guy.
Raising My Father
RaisingMyFather.blogspot.com
jimduchene.blogspot.com American Chimpanzee
@JimDuchene
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